A TRUE LOVE
In three days, my husband and I fly to Ontario to attend a Celebration of Life for our son, Ryan, who died August 6. It will be a tribute put together by his wife and the military, attended by friends, members of his military family, and close family who want an opportunity to say goodbye to a man who touched and changed their lives. I anticipate experiencing an emotional gambit from sorrow to joy but will find and keep the joy.
Part of the happiness will come from spending time with my two granddaughters. On this occasion I am taking them each a small but meaningful gift. It is a photo of their parents before the girls were born. The love Ryan and Lisa feel for each other shines out of the picture, and will find its way into my granddaughter’s hearts, and remind them of what they observed of their parents’ relationship. Ryan and Lisa sacrificed for each other throughout their lives, taking turns as one put an opportunity for advancement, or left a place they’d prefer to live, or turned down an exciting experience in order to help the other reach a goal. And they gave generously to each other through the twenty-three years of their marriage, demonstrating the value they placed in their partner with spa days and roses, an archery set and tickets to a NFL game, a warm kiss or a joyful smile. What they had is rare. I never met a couple more ‘together’.
When Ryan became ill with pancreatic cancer, Lisa took every step of his treatment, illness, pain and suffering with him. And Ryan found the strength to face that evil disease with grace and humour and led her through the agony of lost hopes and futures with tremendous courage.
I hope, for the rest of their lives, the girls will use their photo as a symbol of what can only be described as true love, and will look for and emulate that love in their own relationships.
I, too, have a photo of Ryan and Lisa, because even after fifty-three years of marriage, I need the reminder that love is sacrifice, compromise, generosity, compassion, all giving – and eternal.
My eyes are overflowing with tears and my heart with compassion at the enormity of the loss, but my heart is also overflowing with the message of love that you’ve shared and the possibilities we create for beauty through love.
Beautifully written Madelon. The love between Ryan and Lisa comes through as does the love Mom has for both of them.
I guess my author’s voice was louder than I thought. Separately they were people who made you happy to be around them, together they were magic.
Such an awesome tribute to Ryan and his family, sending lots of love and a huge hug to you. May God provide you with courage and strength. God be with you always.
Your support and empathy helps a lot, as you led the way with the loss of several people dear to you in the past year. Thank you.
What a lovely memorial, Madelon. It sure brought tears to my eyes. Lisa & the girls will have such good memories to help them cope with the grieving process.
Yes, we are all blessed to have good memories of Ryan, who brought so much laughter and love into our lives.
Madelon your message of sacrifice, compromise, generosity, compassion and most of all Love fills my heart. You and your whole family have shown me nothing but courage and commitment since the day I met you. I am wrapping my arms around you my sweet friend.
Yes, we are all blessed to have good memories of Ryan, who brought so much laughter and love into our lives.
Hugs are the foundation on which all the other attributes rest. To know one is supported and loved builds the characteristics with which we move forward. am grateful for yours.
Always thoughtful, always poignant and always touches my heart. May you feel comforted in your memories of your dear Ryan as you are embraced by family and friends. My thoughts are with you.
Your support and empathy helps a lot, as you led the way with the loss of several people dear to you in the past year. Thank you.
What a beautiful tribute to your son. I am sorry to learn of your loss. I recall a time so long ago when you talked about him with great pride. I admire your generosity in writing about and sharing your thoughts so others may benefit. Take care.
Thank you, Glenna. We’re reaching one of the yearly milestones that will shove in our face ‘you will never celebrate Christmas with him again’ and hopefully help us focus on all the joy of having him with us in the past.