EXPLOSION OF SELF: A Woman Released
With the victorious glee of that first action the rebel moves into dangerous and unchartered terrain. She is not aware how many times she will find herself about to step into trap, or fall on a landmine. She does not realize the persistence, strength and number of enemies she will be fighting for her freedom. But at least she has taken up arms to protect herself.
The strongest weapon in her arsenal is love. She comes from love in all her choices, love for her creator, herself and love for the people involved. Loving her creator is an outpouring of her joy as she feels connected with all things and no things. In loving Self she comes from her “truth” not someone else’s. Loving all people she has no need to judge their action or words, but to offer them the same unconditional acceptance she asks for herself.
A second weapon in the war for Self expression becomes communication. No longer does she play by the rules others taught. She refuses to be the silent martyr, the indecisive wife, the seething employee, the smiling hypocrite, the polite liar. She speaks up. “No Aunt Marie it isn’t convenient for me to come to dinner this month.” “No, mother, I am not interested in testing to become an Air Traffic Controller and earn an enormous salary. I love writing poetry and working at the burger joint.” “No husband, dear, I will not join you on another holiday into the outback this year. I will be going to a writer’s retreat instead.” She doesn’t give excuses or explanations. Justifying her choices undermines them. She doesn’t bargain or negotiate unless it is in her best interest and initiated by her. She doesn’t argue, defend or convince. She speaks her truth.
Self lives in the present, because self knows all from the past and does not concern itself with the future. Now is being truly alive. In the now we are most aware. Now recognizes the stimulation of our five senses.
With the ongoing experience of Self claimed in our day to day life, augmented by clear communication and the joy of being connected to all life, we might think we have enough. But it was the faint cry of the soul that brought us to this resuscitation of the meaningful, and it is the call of the soul that whispers our “truth” and directs our choices. To hear that voice we need solitude and stillness, two things eliminated by social emphasis of doing and producing. If you attained either, I warrant it was combined with a sense of guilt and a label of lazy or useless. The rebel fights for time to be alone, to be still so that the great weapons of intuition and spirit can influence her strategy.
The rebel deals with logistics. She fits into her life many things that count: relationships, career, community, Self. Without meeting Self’s “right needs” she does an inferior job of any other tasks she takes on. If she does not nurture Self her relationships are flat, her career sterile, her service begrudging. Self illuminates and adds the spirit, the passion to what she endeavors to create. Self sets priorities, registers goals, meets deadlines and brings cohesive harmony to the whole.
The rebel is about ripping the chains off Self, breaking each bar of self-doubt and self-condemnation formed by accepting what others taught. The rebel creates Self from within and rejects all external influences. In Conversations with God: an uncommon dialogue, Neale Donald Walsch asks “Why look for who you are?” This is a stage that every rebel I know has entered. Only later does she see it is a waste of time. She recognizes that often it is a procrastination against acting to free self – because it is too hard, it will make waves, it will cause rejection, it is a frightening change, and it brings the responsibility of finally being true to Self. Walsch’s solution is that it is time to create the person you want to be. Take action in the present to move you ahead. You don’t need to root around in the past exploring psyche, taking personality and aptitude tests, reading, discussing “you” ad infinitum. This is ego based and ego is based in fear. Evil hides Self in darkness.
Once Self exists free and clear of society and ego, the rebel uses Self as a singular resource. Everything that is sourced externally is ingested internally through the screen of Self’s “truth”. Self forms its own opinion. Acting from what is her “truth” brings Self into the light. Through her emotions, her co-creator too experiences joy, peace, contentment, centredness – all the feelings that tell her she is following her truth. When she hears the voice, lives in the moment and sees clearly, she recognizes much of what we are taught is what Gwen Shamblin calls opposite thinking. Take the word rebel itself. It is a negative label with a connotation of wrongdoing, but the establishment created the label for anyone going against a prevailing social dictate, when that dictate clearly is damaging to the individual. For instance, corporate thinking that money is more important than people, or government thinking that those in a leadership roles have more rights than the people who elected them. Consider cultural thinking that men have more value than women, or social thinking that women are better parents than men.
The rebel in creating Self and recognizing Self’s truth calls upon the benefits, which are unlimited power, energy, potential, and abundance. In claiming Self as her ultimate guide she throws away what can no longer serve her: blame, reliance and co-dependency. She chooses minute-to-minute, and takes responsibility for whether that choice pushes her into the dark or lifts her to the light – makes her part of the light.
The rebel uses her unlimited power to create goodness by wielding the weapons of love, clarity and truth.